在父親節前，邁克爾·傑克遜（Michael Jackson）在世界著名的《Maxim》雜誌的網路票選中被選為“最糟糕的父親”。
傑克遜在這個票選中，竟超過了謀殺犯斯科特·彼得森（Scott Peterson），後者殺害了他的妻子和未出生的孩子。
MJJCN及廣大傑克遜歌迷對此表示強烈的憤慨。這種不負責任的票選，沒有尊重基本的事實，不過又是一次抹黑行動而已。在評論為什麼把傑克遜選為“最糟糕的父親”時，《Maxim》的記者寫道，“把柏林酒店的陽臺上晃嬰兒！我們不知道什麼更瘋狂：傑克遜獨特的養育方式， 還是有女人願意給這個兩度被告猥褻兒童的人生孩子？”
但是，要記得的是，當時傑克遜並沒有在陽臺上“晃”什麼嬰兒，而是在興奮之餘，想讓樓下歌迷看看他的小兒子，而一不小心把孩子抱越了陽臺，時間只有幾秒，之後，他也公開道歉。這是任何一個粗心的父親都會在人生中不小心犯的錯誤，卻被媒體無限誇大，被慢鏡頭無數次播放，仿佛他真的是一個不顧兒子死活，在陽臺上晃孩子玩的怪物！7
至於傑克遜給孩子們蒙面的原因，是因為孩子們的母親、傑克遜的前妻戴比·羅要求傑克遜這樣做。因為她不想孩子的面容被人認出，從而導致綁架事件！要知道傑克遜是什麼樣的身份！林白事件至今還讓人心有餘悸！
傑克遜的前妻在法庭作證時就多次強調：“傑克遜是一個偉大的父親。”這個證詞讓檢察官都汗顏！誰知道傑克遜為了孩子，購買了多少養育類的書籍？買了多少玩具？找了多少保姆？自己又花費了多少心血？任何見過傑克遜孩子的業內人都出來講過，傑克遜把孩子們養育得很好，調教得也很有禮貌。:
至於被告猥褻兒童，請再次記清楚：傑克遜在法庭上，是被法官宣佈十四項被誣告的罪名全部不成立。是十四項，是全部不成立！還有什麼比法律更有說服力的嗎？)
《Maxim》這種不負責任，不經過調查，不採用事實，不經過大腦，嘩眾取寵，聳人聽聞，毫無公平的票選，已經喪失了這本雜誌遵循的專業標杆、職業道德和做人的良心，只圖一時之快，在任何可乘之機裏，肆意污蔑傑克遜的名聲。這種行為，必將遭到世界上清醒人士、正義人士和有起碼良知的人士的共同譴責！
至於某些中國國內媒體跟風翻譯傳播這樣的新聞，也懷著同樣不可告人的居心。他們似乎忘記了中國在之前是如何被全世界妖魔化，忘記了被污蔑時的感覺，忘記了在告訴別人要尊重事實、不懷偏見的同時，自己也要同樣做到。
希望你們讀讀傑克遜當年在牛津大學的演講，聽聽他的心聲。
也請你們讀讀以下這篇文章，問問你的內心，再作評論：
翻譯：CeSsy
2002年12月8日《郵報》周日版
英文原文： http://www.mjfanclub.net/home/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=395&Itemid=122;
感恩節是美國家庭最重要的節日。兩年前我同一個非同尋常的美國家庭過了一個非常特殊的感恩節。因為來我在新澤西州家過感恩節的客人是Michael Jackson以及他的一對兒女——5歲的Prince和3歲的Paris。
是的，就是那個前段時間在德國將他9個月大的小兒子懸吊于離地面60英尺 的陽臺上的Michael Jackson。他現在已經被指責為世界上最壞的父親。儘管Michael Jackson事後為他的瘋狂行為道了歉，我仍然被告知：如果這事發生在美國，他將會失去他三個孩子的養育權。
然而，根據我同Michael Jackson以及他兩個稍大兒女四個月的相處以及度過的那次感恩節，我得出一個頗有爭議的結論：Jackson事實上根本不是一個壞父親！不僅如此，在我看來，他的一對兒女5歲的Prince 和3歲的Paris是我見過的最聽話，最不嬌縱且最安穩的孩子。
在我同他孩子相處的時日，我對他們瞭解也逐漸加深。一次，我給他們讀故事書，Paris坐在我的大腿上，Prince則坐在我腳邊。我斥責Prince，因為他用玩具拖拉機在我的腳面上來回翻滾。Prince很有禮貌地輕聲說了“對不起”，之後又在他爸爸的激勵下重複一遍“對不起”。因為他爸爸認為他第一次的“對不起”聽起來誠意不足。
這並不是我原本想像中他們該有的嬌縱行為或頑童的惡劣。但這還不是唯一的驚奇：Jackson的孩子被外界流傳甚廣的奇聞描述成與世隔絕，不同其他孩子來往。到我卻看到他們同其他人家的小孩連續玩了幾個小時。
外界謠傳說Jackson的孩子所玩的玩具因為防止細菌感染而在每天結束時被銷毀。但我卻看到他們擁抱玩具，甚至吮吸這些幾乎所有孩子都擁有的塑膠垃圾。
我曾經同他們一家逛玩具店，每個孩子只能有一樣玩具。這次短暫的採購開始於晚上7點但很快結束。因為很快就要到孩子們上床睡覺的時間了。
Jackson或許有些神經質，有些古怪甚至非常脆弱。然而他的孩子Prince和Paris卻聰明、自信、充滿愛心且善解人意。他們在飯前做禱告詞，說完整有條理的句子而不是單音節的美國式咕噥。當然，同其他孩子一樣，他們被禁止使用粗俗的言語。
Prince有一張嚴肅的小臉，但卻暗含著頑童的天性和無盡的好奇心。儘管他總是被那些服從他父親的隨從包圍，我卻沒有從這個小男孩的行為舉止中發現一絲一毫的傲慢。
Paris，我認識她時，她還非常小。她有一張非常可愛的小臉。她總是同她哥哥Prince搶著最先跳上爸爸的膝蓋。
孩子們的服裝似乎是由Michael同保姆Grace(一個西班牙血統的女士，她總是隱身於幕後，她非常細心，任何事都逃不過她的注意，如果她現在仍然是他們的保姆，她一定會為她主人最近的過失而難過。)挑選。Michael選擇Prince的，保姆Grace則選擇Paris的。Prince被打扮得日趨像個小紳士，而Paris則似乎總是穿一些小巧精美的，帶有蕾絲花邊的，有些過時的天鵝絨裙子。
我自己也是個有3個孩子的父親，因此我也能理解Prince和Paris之間經常發生的兄妹間常有的日常小矛小盾。一次飯後，Prince指著Paris剛把她戴著的護圍兜偷偷拿下放到桌上的行為嘲笑到：“Paris有個護圍兜，Paris有個護圍兜！”Michael則指出：“你不應該嘲笑你妹妹，你也曾用過護圍兜！”小男孩看起來有點頹喪，還有點不好意思。不過30秒後，他又不斷輕聲重複念叨：“Paris有個護圍兜，Paris有個護圍兜！”而Paris則根本沒有理睬她哥哥Prince。
Jackson很多怪癖都是有他自己的父親嚴厲殘酷的紀律約束造成的。對他自己的孩子，Jackson也非常嚴格，但是是以一種適當得多的人性化的方式。他堅決反對“打孩子”，在他的內心深處有著堅定的信念：絕對要盡可能給孩子最正常的教育。
他也有焦慮，尤其擔心孩子們到了十幾歲時會受到毒品以及娛樂圈背景下不良因素的誘惑和誤導。Jackson堅持“不行就是不行”的信條。但這種紀律規章必須要在沒有怒氣和責駡的條件下進行。當孩子們表現得過於頑劣淘氣或互相鬧彆扭時，他會奪走他們手中的東西，讓他們站到角落一邊去面壁思過。
在Neverland河谷牧場的家裏，他限額配給孩子們玩具。當有小朋友過來玩時，他不允許Prince和Paris稱玩具為“自己的”。此外他還教導孩子們：擁有金錢的唯一原因就是與他人分享它的利益。或許有些令人驚訝，Michael聲稱在虛榮上狠狠栽了跟頭。他告訴我他逮著他大兒子Prince對著鏡子梳頭自得地說：“我看起來真棒！”的情景，Michael當即糾正說：“你看起來一般。”
據他們父親講，Prince和Paris也被教導要靈活變通，要有手腕有策略，即使謊言是錯誤的，但有時還是有必要撒謊的。但這並非是故意撒謊。Michael選擇教孩子們從不同的方面來看待問題。
舉Prince為例，他害怕飛機上不穩定的氣流。你可以嘗試告訴他這不是在飛機上而是在旋轉木馬上，Michael解釋說，Prince會知道這是個謊言，但如果你把飛機想像成旋轉木馬，這就是透視法的問題了。
Michael對自己要求也
非常嚴格。一天他正在錄音室裏錄製他的上一張大碟《Invincible》，Prince進來了，他把爆米花潑灑了一地板。
Michael堅持要自己清理地板：“是我兒子把這弄得一團糟，我來清理！”他告訴那些不知所措的音樂人，隨後當著驚愕的人們跪下清理地板。+ ^9 [% ^ V1 `0 h
Michael同所有的孩子交談時似乎都把他們當作成人對待。他不會忍受孩子們隨意打斷成人的談話但卻又很適應聽孩子們問問題，而不像我們其他成年人選擇裝聾。他怕狗卻又給他的孩子們買了條金毛狗，認為把他的偏見傳遞給他的孩子是不正確的。他也不喜歡那些為了應付孩子問出的難以解釋的問題而編造答案隨意應付孩子。他喜歡到自己藏書豐富的私人圖書館去查閱正確答案。$ g' a: f+ y* D( ?
那麼Michael最近在德國做出的陽臺事件又是怎麼回事？我想他是在以一種比較愚蠢的方式實踐他的另一個教育原則：孩子們必須被教導不要害怕任何事物，包括恐高！一次晚宴上，他告訴我他愛上了“危險”，但他自己也不知道為什麼。
這種解釋或許不足以讓那些指責Michael的社會工作者信服，但他們或許可以看看Michael於去年在牛津大學做的關於他自己的童年以及他孩子的演講：
“如果他們長大後因為我的選擇影響了他們的成長而憎恨我該怎麼辦？‘為什麼我們沒能像其他孩子一樣有一個正常的童年？’他們或許會這樣問我。那時我會祈禱我的孩子們說：‘我們的爸爸已經盡力了，他面對的是獨一無二的情況。’我希望他們能總是把焦點放在積極的方面，比如我心甘情願為他們做出的犧牲；而不是那些他們不得不放棄的事情，或我在撫養他們的過程中犯過的或將要不能避免犯下的錯誤。因為我們都曾是他人的孩子，而且我們都清楚，儘管有非常好的計畫和努力，錯誤仍總是會發生。因為人孰能無過？”5
_（邁克爾·傑克遜中國網 by Keen 2008年6月15日）
Wacko? No, He's A Good Father
by Jonathan MargolisDecember 8, 2002
Grace before every meal and impeccable manners - Michael Jackson really looks after his children, by the writer who got to know him best ...
Thanksgiving is the biggest day of the year for American families. In every home in the United States , dinner is turkey with all the trimmings and pumpkin pie. It was at such a typical dinner that I spent Thanksgiving two years ago - but with a rather atypical American family. For the guest's at my friends home in New Jersey were Michael Jackson and his five year old boy, Prince Michael The First, and three year old girl, Paris.
Yes, the same Michael Jackson who, after dangling his youngest child, Prince Michael The Second, over a 60ft Berlin balcony, is now condemned as the world's worst father. In spite of Jackson 's abject apology for his crazy behaviour, I am told by social workers that if the incident had happened in this country, all three children would probably have been taken into care.
And yet, on the basis of four months I spent around Michael and his two elder children before and after that Thanksgiving, I came to a controversial conclusion: Jackson isn't actually that bad a dad at all. Not only that, but Prince Michael The First and Paris are, in my experience, among the best behaved, least spoilt and most balanced of children.
During my time with the Jackson children, I got to know them quite well. I read to them, with Paris on my lap, and Prince sitting next to me. I also told off Prince for running over my foot with a toy tractor. (He responded by politely saying sorry, and repeating the apology with the prompting from his dad, who didn't think the first sounded 'sorry enough'.)
This was not the behaviour of the spoilt, dysfunctional brats I was expecting. But there were other surprises. The Jackson children of popular mythology live in isolation and are denied contact with other kids. But I have seen them play for hours with friends.
The Jackson children reputedly have all their toys destroyed at the end of the day for fear of infection. But I have seen them hugging and sucking the manky, unhygienic plastic junk that all children have.
I have trailed around a toy shop with Prince and Paris on one of Michael's private shopping binges. It took place at 7pm and was brought swiftly to an end because the children's bedtime was approaching - they were allowed just one toy each.
Jackson may be neurotic, eccentric and downright flaky, but Prince and Paris are bright, confident, affectionate and considerate. They say Grace before meals, speak in sentences rather than monosyllabic American grunts and are forbidden, like many children, from using rude language.
Prince has a solemn face, but an impish nature and a relentless curiosity. Although he is surrounded by staff eager to do his father's bidding, I found no hint of arrogance in the little boys manner.
Paris was tiny when I knew her, with a cute, pointy little face. She would always compete with Prince to be the first to jump on Dad's knee. Since Jackson is divorced from the children's mother, Debbie Rowe, they were looked after by Governess Grace. A Hispanic lady, who kept herself in the background, she was always watchful. I do not believe anything would escape her attention and, if she is still the nanny, I dread to think what grief she would have given her employer for the balcony nonsense.
The children's clothes seemed to be chosen by Michael in Prince's case, and Governess Grace in Paris 's. On special occasions, Prince tends to be done up like a little Lord Fauntleyroy. Paris always seemed to be wearing dainty, lacy and slightly dated velvet dresses.
As a father of three, I could see Prince and Paris exchanged a healthy amount of argy-bargy that goes on between siblings. Over one meal, Prince spotted that Paris had smuggled her security blanket up to the table. ' Paris has a blankey, Paris has a blankey' he taunted. Michael pointed out that Prince really shouldn't laugh because he had a 'blankey,' too. The little boy look chastened and a little embarrassed at this having been revealed. Thirty seconds later, but quietly, this time, Prince started again: ' Paris has a blankey ...' Paris ignored him.
Much of Jackson 's eccentricity goes back to his own father's harsh discipline. With his own children, Michael is tough but in an infinitely more considered, humane way. He is resolutely anti-smacking, and somewhere inside the hazy fog of whatever it is that obscures his sharp mind is a solid determination that his children should have the most normal upbringing possible.
He is anxious in particular, that when they all hit their teens they should avoid drugs and other distractions of a showbiz background. He insists 'no means no', but discipline must be administered without anger or yelling. When the children are naughty or unkind to one another, he favours taking things away from them and making them stand in the corner.
At home in Neverland he rations their toys. They are not allowed to refer to toys as 'mine' when they have friends over and have been taught that the only reason to have money is to share its benefits with others. Somewhat astonishingly, Michael claims to come down heavily on vanity. He tells how he caught Prince combing his hair in a mirror and saying 'I look good.' Michael corrected him by saying: 'You look OK.'
Prince and Paris are also taught to be diplomatic, but not to lie. Even white lies are wrong according to their father. He prefers to teach children to 'see things from a different dimension'.
Prince, for instance, is afraid of turbulence on aeroplanes. If you tell him he's not on a plane but a rollercoaster, Michael explains, he will know it's a lie. But if you say we're on a plane, but think of it as a rollercoaster, it becomes a matter of perspective.
Michael is also hard on himself. One day when he was recording his last album, Prince came to the studio and spilled popcorn on the floor. Michael insisted on cleaning it up himself. 'It's my son who made the mess. I'll clean it up' he told the bemused musicians as he got down on his hands and knees.
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, a friend of Michael, and host at our Thanksgiving dinner, believes the star has a rare, instinctive empathy with children - possibly from never having grown up himself. He tells of the time his eight year old daughter got lost at Neverland. Finding her crying, his instinct was to tell her not to be silly, but Michael intervened and said: 'I know how you feel, I remember that happening to me when I was a little boy'. I saw this empathy many times. Michael talks to all children as if they were adults. He will not tolerate them interrupting an adult conversation but is unusually attuned to hearing a child's voice asking a question when most of us choose to be slightly deaf. He is terrified of dogs but has bought his children a golden retriever, thinking it was wrong for him to pass on his irrational prejudice. He also dislikes making up answers to awkward questions the children ask. He likes to go to his vast private library to research the correct answer.
So what was Michael Jackson doing in the now infamous balcony scene? What led a man obsessed to the point of paranoia with his children's safety, to endanger his baby so needlessly? I can only guess he was carrying out, in a daft way, another of his principles - that children should be taught not to be afraid of anything. He told me at dinner that night that he is in love with danger, but didn´t understand why.
It is hard to see this explanation carrying much weight with the social workers Michael may face if anything like the Berlin incident happens again. But perhaps they could take notice of a part of the speech he made about childhood and his children last year at Oxford University :
'What if they grow older and resent me, and how my choices impacted their youth? "Why weren't we given an average childhood like all the other kids?" they might ask. And at that moment I pray that my children will give me the benefit of the doubt. That they will say to themselves, "Our daddy did the best he could, given the unique circumstances he faced."
'I hope' he concluded, 'that they will always focus on the positive things, on the sacrifices I willingly made for them, and not criticise the things they had to give up, or the errors I´ve made, and will certainly continue to make in raising them. For we all have been someone's child, and we know that despite the very best of plans and efforts, mistakes will always occur. That´s just being human.'
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